You like math. You like movies. You'll love...

...these graphic representations of famous movies.  From FlowingData through David Chen at /Film.

Watch THIS Instantly... Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles II: The Secret of the Ooze

Who Is It For... 
Primarily my 7-year-old boy (though my 5-year-old girl and 2-year-old boy are digging it as well)

What's It About...
This is the sequel to the first live action TMNT movie. It follows the continuing adventures of four pizza-loving, wise-cracking turtles who battle evil under the watchful eye of a wise old rat.  In this movie, the turtles' enemy Shredder discovers the secret to the turtles' power and creates his own mutants.  Chaos ensues.

Why Kids Will Love It...
Pizza.  Martial arts.  Turtles. 

Parental Cheat Sheet...
The turtles wear different colors.  Leonardo wears blue and is the leader.  Raphael wears red and has a temper.  Michaelangelo is the comic relief and wears orange.  Donatello is the smart one and wears purple.

The rat is their teacher and is named Splinter.

Wrestling Fans!  Kevin Nash plays Super Shredder.  

Running Time...
88 Minutes

Parental Advisory...
Cartoonish violence and some minor profanity

Available on...
Netflix Watch Instantly

Did Hollywood Really Learn Anything? (and Other Questions Raised by Avatar)

We are in what is likely the final big weekend for Avatar as Alice in Wonderland takes over the valuable 3-D real estate next weekend (assuming this does not come to pass). So it's a good time to review not just the film, but it's impact on film-making...

1. James Cameron remains box office champ. There were a lot of questions leading up to Avatar's release, to say nothing of Ferngully and Smurf jokes. When it's all said and done, Cameron owns the new domestic and international box office records. He beat his own records set with Titanic and did it with his very next major theatrical release. There are plenty of criticisms about the movie, but nobody, NOBODY, knows Hollywood like the self-proclaimed King of the World. All of which leads us to...

2. Will Hollywood learn the right lessons? The out-of-the gate answer is a resounding "no." Avatar became a box office juggernaut for a few reasons: 1) 3-D technology, 2) timing, and 3) word of mouth. The 3-D technology is the biggest miscalculation going on in Hollywood economics today. Avatar is a successful 3-D movie because, at every phase of production, it was designed to be a 3-D movie. What you see on the screen is a director understanding the technology and using it to draw an audience into a new world. Simply converting a movie like Clash of the Titans to 3-D in post-production can never be as effective. Sure, studios will earn a premium on the initial weeks of release. But when the next 3-D movie is right around the corner, the movie's time in relatively scarce 3-D theaters will be cut short. Avatar did not have anything to boot it from those 3-D screens until this week, and has had great word of mouth as a movie that can only be experienced in some stadium seating. None of the movies heading to theaters now will have those benefits.

3. Weta Worksop is a powerhouse. For the better part of 30 years, ILM was the only game in town for major studio releases. Then a small independent film based on an obscure author's work placed Weta Workshop in New Zealand on the map as its first real competitor. The company's work on Avatar has leapfrogged it beyond ILM. Now, even George Lucas' best buddy Steven Spielberg is hanging with kiwis to play with newest toys. In the same way ILM was Lucas' true legacy, Weta is quickly becoming Peter Jackson's.

4. Remember the international markets. At its heart, Avatar told a simply story with whiz-bang special effects and great action set pieces. It's made more than the GDP of countries like Liberia and Bhutan. A lot of the reason is that it translates really well everywhere while offering visuals no one has ever seen. For those who thought the plot and dialogue of Avatar was insipid, guess what? Expect a lot more where that came from.

5. Electronics companies better getting working on the home theater 3-D systems really fast. The hemorraging of the DVD market is something that has been covered a lot. However, in exchange for that $3 dollar premium for 3-D glasses, studios are going to lose even more DVD sales. A great 3-D experiences requires you to sit in a theater. The Avatar: Special Edition Director's Cut on the average television screen just won't cut it. I would expect Avatar to sell a lot of DVDs, but ultimately consumers are going to learn that they can't replicate the theater experience at home. Sony and others are starting to address this, but it will be years before your average household can match the full immersion the viewer gets in Avatar. I personally am in no way jonesing for my own DVD copy of Pandora as I know it can do nothing but disappoint.

I loved Avatar and will probably try catch it one last time on the big 3-D screen. It is having a bigger impact on film-making, marketing and distribution. And, frankly that is not entirely a great thing.

Seven-year-olds, Gremlins and Santa Claus (or How I Learned to Pre-Screen All Films)

So, I'm looking for a non-traditional Christmas movie to show my seven-year-old son and remember one of my favorite movies from my youth Gremlins.

Gremlins is of course the 1984 fantasy comedy about what happens when the recipient of a small creature fails to observe three seemingly innocuous rules. Chaos ensues as the town is overrun by Gremlins. The entire story takes place during Christmas time in a small town.

So, Devin and I are watching the film and I, having not seen the movie for many years, am remembering scenes as they come up and giggling to myself as I realize how much fun Devin is going to have with each moment of increasing mayhem.

But...

There is a scene late in the movie when Phoebe Cates explains to Zach Galligan why she hates Christmas. I instantly remember that she is about to describe in vivid detail how her father sought to surprise her by dressing as Santa and climbing down the chimney (note to fathers out there: this is a fundamentally stupid idea; fathers are capable of stupid things, but we are talking Darwin award here). The father becomes stuck, DIES, and then is found by his daughter when she tries to start a fire (again, I don't usually allow my own children to start fires in the house, but...).

Luckily, I remember this just before it happens and choose that moment to ask my son about his day. The scene seemingly ends and my son has heard none of it. Then Phoebe Cates offers this coda:

"And that's how I found out there was no Santa Claus."

My jaw drops. My son turns to me with this curious look and says...

"Wait a minute...."

I hold my breath for the inevitable question.

"...there's no Santa Claus..."

I have crushed a little boy's sense of wonder...

"...in this movie?"

I pause.

"I guess not. This movie must not have a Santa Claus. Isn't that weird?"

"Yeah, that's really weird."

Note to parents: Let this be a cautionary tale. Always prescreen your movies. Even if you've seen it before. You may also want to read the screenplay and interview the director if possible.

Pop by and Watch

What are we watching tonight?

How I Met Your Mother - Will Ted finally meet his future wife? Is Robin pregnant with Barney's baby? Does Lily get paid by the episode or by the minute (if it's by the minute, she needs a fundraiser)? Will we see the goat? Tonight's episode will be legen-wait for it-dary.

24 - Will Jack Bauer lay the smack down on Tony? Will Kim get herself into some ridiculous situation? Will Jack survive his illness? I'm not tuning in for the answers; I'm tuning in to figure out how they get to 'Yes.'

What to watch this summer

Last weekend saw the arrival of my second-most-anticipated of the summer. So what else has me squirming to get back into a seat with cookie dough bites and Coke?

1. Inglourious Basterds - Sorry to all the other summer flicks, but any Quentin Tarantino movie instantly pops to the top of my list. The teaser trailer for this Brad Pitt WWII film looks like more fun than we deserve during the summer. Definitely not for the kids. Trailer

2. Star Trek - I am not a Trekkie, Trekker, Trekee, whatever term they use these days. I am a big fan of JJ Abrams. Cloverfield, Alias, Lost, Fringe, Mission Impossible III, even Felicity were great. The cast here looked great and the movie is exactly what you need during the summer: lots and lots of fun.

3. Terminator: Salvation - Okay, I've been converted. The movie I was least excited about six months ago is now near the top of my list. The trailers and the cast have me sold. I still worry about McG, but it's hard to ignore the talent involved here. Trailer

4. Drag Me to Hell - Sam Raimi returns to horror? And you wonder why this is on the list? Go watch the Evil Dead trilogy. Trailer

5. Up - Is there a more reliable name in movies than Pixar right now? They put the story first, cast voice actors who embody there characters perfectly and tell tales no one else is telling. Old man sets off in his house flown by hundreds of helium balloons. What's not to love? Trailer

6. Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen - I hate 99% of what Michael Bay does, but Bay and Transformers go together like peanut butter and jelly. He finally has found a property uniquely suited to his fetish for army equipment and female midriffs. The sequel looks like the first cranked up to 11. Trailer

Dishonorable Mention

X-Men Origins: Wolverine - Saw this one as though I was checking something off of the to-do list. It was better than I was expecting, but I went in with zero expectation. It's a movie that basically bounces from cliche to cliche with zero sense of style. Marvel has been the second most reliable name in movies (after Pixar), but even the trailers looked meh.

G.I. Joe: The Rise of Cobra - I spent a fair amount of my childhood engaged in battle in my basement between the forces of G.I. Joe and Cobra. I dropped a lot of money of Larry Hama's G.I. Joe comic books. Both experiences look much better than the trailers for Stephen Sommers flick. The Eiffel Tower scene looks good, but most other things just seem pointlessly goofy. Only saving grace? The cast actually looks pretty good here.

Comedy - There may yet be a surprise this summer, but there is nothing with a lot of buzz attached to it. I know comedy is more difficult, but where is it? Maybe Year One won't disappoint, but it looks pretty forgettable.

The end of JJ Abrams week

So Lost had it's finale this week. Star Trek came out last weekend. Two absolutely amazing events.

Let's start with Lost. The show had its best opening since Jack awoke in the forest following the plane crash. The Black Rock, the statue, Jacob and... well, whoever he was. It ends with Sayid and Juliet seemingly dying, Locke not being Locke and finally finding out what lies in the shadow of the statue. Oh, and an H-bomb detonation. I've stopped with theorizing about the show and am just enjoying the ride.

Lost remains television's grandest experiment. When they decided to put an end date on the show two seasons ago, the writing improved and every episode gives the story momentum. Many other serial television shows would have benefited from similar decisions (I'm looking in your general direction, X-Files). ABC should be commended for both taking schedule chances and seeing them pay off.

As for Star Trek, it seems like every year there is a successful franchise reboot and this is it for 2009. Abrams Star Trek is the first to combine 'thrilling' and 'fun' into the same Star Trek movie. Every actor manages to capture the original without doing an impression of them. Better yet, it's one I can see my almost seven-year-old handling. If it's not the best movie of the summer, it'll have to be in the top three.

About this blog, thing, whatever...

I am a geek, nerd, choose your own popular turn of phrase. I love movies, TV, comics, youtube, facebook, etc. I particularly love sci-fi and super heroes, though comedy, horror, and foreign films also dot my Netflix queue.

I am also a husband, father of two and state employee. I love playing with my kids, quiet evenings with the missus and trying to solve the latest budget problems at work.

This blog is where those two worlds collide. How can I watch the latest episode of Lost or Supernatural on the DVR without the scarring the kids for life? When are my kids ready for Star Wars? Lord of the Rings? Zombie movies (heh)?

Sometimes, this will be a movie review or television review. Sometimes it will be navigating the rivers of pop culture with the kids in tow. Sometimes just whatever is on my mind. Whatever happens I hope it is entertaining!